Greetings for everybody - Need your point of views, you migh

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ji
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Greetings for everybody - Need your point of views, you migh

Post by ji »

Well, since I'm a new member to this Yang Family Tai Chi forum, I might as well go for my initiation and chicken dance right away, done.

Hi, I'm proud of finally reaching to other Tai Chi Chuan practitionners for the first time or anything that has to do with our long forgotten inner selves.

I'm ji, or Jean-Francois. People use to call me ji, less complicated, more simple until the day I found out from my chinese depanneur owner, that ji stands for honesty or misty lake. Being both trustworthy and mysterious, I liked that and suddenly my name just shaped into a form, just like my tai chi changed my life. Or was it, my actions? hmmm.

I'm 25 years old and consider myself like a little tree in need of stronger roots. I've been practicing Tai Chi Chuan for 3 years and a half now, and let me tell you this, sometimes I just wonder, is it me, or the whole world around me that has changed? Sounds familiar?

Through Tai Chi Chuan, I learned to respect older people for what they know and learned to be tolerant toward ignorance that youth has to offer sometimes. I was told by my doctors that by the age of 25 I could not be able to walk anymore. That was, 10 years ago. And then, a miracle happened to me, that was, 5 years ago, the first time I heard about Qigong and read about Tai Chi Chuan. To me, the miracle, like a heaven sent, was and still is, my teacher. I profoundly admire this person for what he is and for the message he preaches to everybody. That is to me, the kind of teacher that would have made me stick to my school desk for a very long time.

Guess other people than me had some kind of similar experience, and I'm sorry to speak up in such a selfish way. I guess it's just the energy that says it's time that a part of the world know about me a little bit for nobody should be unheard if they are suffering. And today, my friends, and for many months since March 2007, I have been suffering, and I seek your wisdom, your advices. The Do-it yourseld method, this time, did not work out.

End of Chapter 1, hahaha... oh my. Is it me or all aquarius are cursed with the gift of writing.

Okay. First week of March, I hit my head on the bathroom water pipe while rising from a crouched position, and got injured to some degree, nothing too serious. Then started to have headache, confusion, so went to hospital and they said I had a small concussion, that it can be normal that I catch a migraine once in a while for a year to come. Then a specialist came to me, and out of the blue, I confessed that I was stressed with my job, being a computer shop owner, that I wanted to be just like my teacher, to work with plants and nature, and to teach Tai Chi Chuan and many other things too that should never be hidden from a single human being. I had this profound desire to be in peace with myself.

Or was it me that did not want to be flexible (which would explain a part of my youth and my legs), and adapt myself to this new way of living (being a owner, is very different from being an employee).

In any case, I don't feel good. My head is tense, a lot of heat, the sides acts like, I dunno, but I feel them crushing my head, as if my head was looking to expand itself having no more room to breathe properly. That kind of pain makes me want to hit my head on the wall knowing it won't give much good results. Its not just a migraine, for no medication works (the one prescribed by the doctors), and the only moment I am not aware of this pain, is when I sleep.

My teacher did a method, or art that is call: jin shin do (thats the best way for me to try to mimic the way it was said in words). He asked about myself, how I was doing, then we went with the massage (acupressure points, something like that), and after I got up at the end of the session
and cried out in tears for the very first time in a very long time. Told me that I repressed many emotions down there, in the heart. That my place with my associate at work would maybe be not the right place to be right now, or forever.

And many other things, but that would be really long to explain. My head is still hurting me, doctors dont find anything, hahah.

Need to go, I'll be back with more info.
Hey, rude and arrogant entrance, I apologize, later everybody.
Simon Batten
Posts: 153
Joined: Fri Jun 02, 2006 6:01 am
Location: Brighton, East Sussex, England

Post by Simon Batten »

Thanks, Jin, for sharing this with us - it must have taken a lot of guts - a good martial virtue to have. I'm afraid I don't know though what the answer is to banging your head on the pipe and suffering headaches afterwards. I wouldn't begin to know how to cure that, but you could try Embryonic breathing and while doing so lead your chi to the affected area, remembering of course to lead it back again to the Tant'ien afterwards. This worked for me when I fractured my ankle 6 years ago and it healed very quickly but I think also it's a good idea if you're going to attempt this only to lead half your chi around and leave the rest to get on with its job of regulating the body, otherwise you might be cured of the affliction quickly but feel run down.

It sounds as if you're in the wrong occupation, especially if your Master also says that. But it's difficult to find a way to earn a living and at the same time stay true to your principles and be yourself; the plain fact of the matter is that no-one really wants to pay you to be yourself in this world and if anything, money tends to go into the pockets of those who disguise themselses as something other than what they are for material gain ... (On the other hand, there's this quote from the 20th century author and sage, Elias Canetti, from his book 'The Human Province': 'The outer bearing of people is so ambiguous that you only have to present yourself as you are to live fully unrecognised and concealed' ...) But with some thought it should be possible to strike some sort of balance between ideals and 'earning a crust'. It's worth remembering also, that the great Taoist meditators of the past had to have a private income so that when they were in a Wuji state, etc, their bodies could be looked after and safeguarded while the spirit wandered ... So to just 'turn on, tune in and drop out' really isn't a practicable solution at all. Whatever you end up doing, I would say don't ever feel useless, though. 'Useless' can be good, like the tree in the Book of Chuang Tzu which had knotty wood and was useless for carpentry so it was never cut down and lived therefore to a venerable old age while the other, useful trees were felled early in life. Then the great old tree provided shade for people and animals and became revered as a sacred tree. Kind regards, Simon.
Audi
Posts: 1238
Joined: Sat Jan 27, 2001 7:01 am
Location: New Jersey, USA

Post by Audi »

Hi Ji,

Thanks for sharing. I hope things get better with you.

By the way, if you want more feed back or comments, you might want to be more specific in your request. I am not really sure what sort of response you were after in your post, especially under the Barehand Form Forum. Others may be in the same position.

Take care,
Audi
Steveg219
Posts: 44
Joined: Tue Aug 14, 2007 6:01 am
Location: Scottsdale, AZ USA

Post by Steveg219 »

I agree with the last post, I am very interested in helping but I am not clear on what would be of use to you. Please let us know more specifically what would be of value for you.
ji
Posts: 3
Joined: Tue Aug 28, 2007 6:01 am
Location: Canada
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Post by ji »

I am back everyone, sorry for the interruption. Well, I am still at work, and to give you updates, I am going to run a scan for my head on november 2. For now, the doctor said I seem to be having a chronic constant migraine. And from what I heard, migraine is something they have more problem dealing with then the one suffering with it. Am I wrong there? Thanks.
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