Hi BertVa,
I also like Bob's and Louis's response, but want to add a few suggestions.
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">1 Speed - My form is way to fast even when i think I'm going slow I am still going way to fast. I do not know how to slow down any more.</font>
I think that speed has at least two components: continuity and rhythm. The continuity in the form should be established within the first few postures. You should probably closely monitor the speed you use to raise your arms in the Opening Posture, the speed you use to pivot and step in Ward Off Left and Right, and the speed you use to rotate into Single Whip. These moves have most of the types of movement used in the form and if you can consciously keep your speed constant through Single Whip, you should be set.
If you find keeping this continuity difficult, there may be several reasons. For convenience, let's call them Qi (physical matter/energy), Yi (meaning), and Shen (focus).
By Qi, I mean physical issues. Perhaps your body feels your leg strength is insufficient and so makes you want to hurry through positions where all the weight is on one leg. If you do not fully separate full and empty in the legs, it is easy to speed up.
If your body feels you are not in sufficient shape to do what you are attempting, your breath will tend to shorten and make you want to speed up and finish each posture. Your Qi keeps rising and disturbing your calm, making you want to race to a place where you feel you can rest and recharge.
To combat these feelings, make sure that your stride is appropriate and you can separate full and empty in the feet. Make sure that you are breathing comfortably and stably. Feel that if someone touched from behind at any point, you could instantly freeze in place and feel comfortable and stable. In other words, feel for the stillness in the movement.
By Yi, I am referring to what you feel is the immediate purpose for your movements and the positioning of your limbs. If you tend to think of each posture as being useful only at the end point, you will tend to hurry through what you think of as useless or secondary motions that simply prepare for the "real" posture.
A way to improve the intent is to cultivate the feeling that you are doing something useful during every moment of each transition. For instance, in Press, feel that you are in contact with the opponent and affecting him during the entire movement and not just at the end. Sometimes, you may need to ask someone to show you more of the meaning behind various motions in the transitions, although not every movement is necessary fully meaningful in a martial way.
By Shen, I mean how we focus the mind and what we focus it on.
Of Yang Chengfu's Ten Essentials, two deal directly with speed: "Seek stillness in motion" and "Continuously and without interruption." Many other principles imply something about speed: e.g., drawing the energy like silk. As you do the form, make sure that you put sufficient focus on these aspects. Where you put your attention will tend to control intent, which in turn will tend to control what your body does.
The other component of speed is rhythm. According to my understanding, every move has at least one Yin-Yang transition and most have several. As you do the form, you should start to feel for these transitions, and this may help you maintain your speed appropriately.
One technique that many musicians use to keep a rhythm is to count the off beats. For instance, instead of counting just: "1--2--1--2," they will count "1-and-2-and-1-and-2-and" during the same length of time. Where I grew up, kids learn to count off seconds by saying: "one mississippi, two mississippi, three mississippi, etc.," rather than simply counting: "one," "two," "three," etc.
As you do your form, you may want to start to identify the Yin portion of every Yang movement and the Yang portion of every Yin movement and give these equal time. If you are going to shift your weight forward, give equal attention to the previous shift backward. If you move to the left, give attention to the prior move to the right. If you circle an arm, can you feel 360 degrees of the circle, or just a small bit?
As you break the form down into smaller pieces, while still feeling for the unity, it becomes easier to maintain a calm and slower pace. With more to do, you can be less tempted to try to hurry things along.
<font face="Verdana, Arial" size="2">2 Softness - I just to not think I understand how to relax the waist and chest are wrong.</font>
As I understand it, "softness" and "relaxing" the waist and chest" are different issues, If your concern is about the effect on the breath, than "softness" is probably a secondary issue.
I think the main thing you want to do is to sink Qi to the dantian so that it is available for use. To sink it, you have to use your mind and seek for the right feeling. To help you do this, you need to do some physical things:
--drop the tailbone so that you don't tip the top of the pelvis forward
--separate the shoulder blades and round/pluck up the back to allow you to hollow the chest, as if the outside of the chest was wrapping around something to hold or contain something
--open up the small of the back (ming men).
If you do these physical things, you can have the feeling that the source of your energy can drop down the middle of the front of your body, in opposition to the energy used to hold up your spine, torso, and head. This makes it easier to calm and even out the breath.